Odd-Match sure has been a blessing to my social life. I used to talk to no real human people outside of life, and now I talk to… um… hang on a moment. According to a percentage calculator, that would be an increase of infinity. Times two!
I don’t know, but I have two friends now, because they’re both into speaking the language of cars just like I am, and common interests makes you friends. I think. I mean, wow… people who are into things like gaming and going out to parties much have SO many friends!
I’ll have you know, I was going to open a car mechanic shop. Bentleigh would have been just the right spot for it. I had all these grand plans for my life, like applying for Madame Vroom’s academy and being rich and famous and adored. Then I discovered that I could talk to cars, and suddenly mechanics weren’t as keen to take me on as an apprentice. One guy did, way down in Lakes Entrance, but he was in his nineties and totally deaf, and didn’t think much of me whispering sweet nothings to the vehicles in the shop.
Anyway, he died. Or retired, I’m not too sure. I showed up at the garage for work one morning and found a sign saying that the place was closed due to illness, and that was it for my mechanic career. Now I just talk to cars on a more casual basis, like asking them if they’re going anywhere nice on their holidays or seeing if they’ve been treated well by their owners. I’d still like to be a mechanic one day, but it’s hard to get into that all by yourself. You need a mechanic certification, and I don’t know of any auto service local to Bentleigh who really want me around.
Ugh, it’s just all a bit much. I’ll just stick to my deep and meaningful interactions with vehicles. Well, mostly cars. Motorbikes can be a bit brash, and boats have this smug superiority about them. Electric scooters are okay.
-Ron